Wounds are fresh and hot but they are served up with a side of cold. This is about relationships starting and ending. It happens all-the-time! Let me set the scene for you.
My precious Feesh just successfully (about 70%) pulled emotionally away from an extremely toxic relationship. Within just a couple short months another suitor gained her attention. Instead of taking the time to really let those open, constantly picked at wounds to heal, my precious Feesh romantically started to fall again for her friend. I am all about mushy love stories and was hoping for the best. More time than not, that's not the case. I myself have been in more than enough relationships to feel the burn of rejection. Alas, it wasn't meant to be for my Feesh. Instead of brushing off her shoulders, she deems the world as mad and that love isn't real. How can that be when I love her so much? Hmm.....?
Here's a few lessons we can all learn from Feesh and hopefully she's going to read them and learn for herself.
Be open and honest with what you are feeling no matter who you are feeling them about. If it ends, it's still going to hurt, no less if your cards were on the table. At least you can say you led with an open heart and let things happen the way they should. Guys are scared too! They don't get hints and setting up scenarios always sets them up for disaster. Talk to them, if they don't feel the same at least there are no games, no hints, no confusion on trying to torture yourself with trying to figure it out. AND the sooner the better, that way you're not wasting time on the wrong person.
Take time for yourself to heal. When a relationship ends (over & over & over) we lose a little piece of ourselves. Its those pieces that we've given to that other person that is no longer in our lives. Here's the thing about those holes in us, they need to fill up by themselves. If you try to fill them with other people, you're really just putting a band-aid on the open wound. You only really re-injuring the hurt, not letting it heal. Only you and time will let those things heal. See, now that this dude has pulled away from my Feesh, those unhealed wounds are back open ozzing yucking, foul, drippy, negativity of pessimistic hatred for love. (That's a lot of adjectives, better appreciate them).
Love thyself first and other love will follow. If you don't love you, then how can you expect anyone else to love you? Bitch get your swagger on!
Everyone we meet and spend time with in our lives are there to show us something. Something about ourselves and/or something about the world. As for SP(dude) & Feesh, I know exactly why they had their time together, and it wasn't about jumping into another relationship or killing off the idea of love. It was about feeling things that she thought were dead inside. Figuring out what you really want. Caring for a friend more than just a friend and realizing a friend could be a lover too. It's about knowing that you can fall again. That time together brought so much life out of her that seemed to have been beaten out of her. She was able to let go and love herself. She has gotten her swagger back. Now, she just needs to take what she learned from this and move forward, happily. It's like falling down and blaming your shoes. You willingly put on the shoes and you could have not been looking where you were going. I'm sure somewhere down the line all she wanted was to feel that way again. Well, her prayers got answered. How do I know this? Because I've made the same mistake about not asking for exactly what I wanted. All I wanted was to fall in love and that's exactly what happened and then it all fell apart. And then when I was NOT specific about anything, this douche bag somehow made it into my life and continued to mess things up.
You have to stay on top of your thoughts. Invite in good and you will get good. But just like weeds when you're not looking, crap finds its way in. Know thyself and what you deserve and want. You will get it.
Randomly rambling, Merry Ms (<3ing Feesh) Berry
August 19, 2011
August 17, 2011
Things that I've learned from Zoey
- Tone is extremely important when talking. You can be saying something nice but with the wrong tone it will come off offensively or dominating.
- Be comfortable anywhere. Whether you're upside in a bed of pillows or just lounging outside in the lawn, it's important to be you. Be comfortable being you, it will make everyone else around you more comfortable.
- Bite me once, shame on you. Bite my twice, shame on me. Enough said.
- It's only fur don't let it ruin your day. Little things are going to disrupt your day like white fur on a black pair of pants. It's going to happen, brush it off and keep going.
- Kiss the tears away. I was in a toxic relationship and cried a lot and Zoey was always there to kiss the tears off my face. She would go above and beyond to get to me to make me feel better. If someone you love is in pain, make sure you go out of your way to make them feel better.
- Chase squirrels!!! Go after what you want, even if you have failed every time. If you have fun chasing squirrels, keep doing it. If you love sports but suck at them, keep doing them. Who cares? It's all about having fun.
- Be excited to see the ones you love. Every time I come home she would freak out, jump and kiss me. How can you ever stay in a bad mood when someone shows you they love to see you? Be excited to see your loved ones.
- Love unconditionally. We all make mistakes. We are all going to get dirty, get sick, say the wrong things, all we can do is forgive those we love and love them unconditionally to let them know everything is going to be okay.
- Acknowledge the ones you love. We all can't communicate perfectly but if we try to figure it out the signs and clues or even a look in their eyes, you'll just know what or how they are feeling. Be aware and notice your loved ones as much as possible. We all need our existence to be acknowledged
Lovingly, Merry Ms Berry (Zoey's mommy)
August 16, 2011
Just cuz I give doesn't mean you can always just take from me.
I love to give of myself to others. Not in a dirty, slutty way, but in an emotional, spiritual, monetary, or brainstorming way. I love to share with people. If I have a dollar and you need it, it's yours. If you have a sitaution that needs attending to, I'm here to help look for solutions. I like being that person that people can turn to.
But I do not like people who are leeches, who drain the energy right from your soul. The people who know how nice you are and think they can take advantage of you. Those people in your life that do nothing but complain and dump all their problems on you. The same people that unless you are "going to take care" of them, don't want to be bothered with doing the right thing to help themselves. If you are one of these people....JUST STOP IT!(after rereading this, how do these people know that its them?...haha!)
If you are one of the people that keeps giving and giving and giving and is starting to feel resentful or just feel drained.....STOP giving! It's okay to stop. I give you permission. You have to take care of your FIRST!!! If you are the one that keeps listening to the same problems from people, over and over and over and over, and even though you have given solutions out, nothing changes....stop listening. Let these people figure out their own crap because apparently they don't think they need to listen to you. If you've been having the same conversation for years, it's time to stop having it. It's not going to change. You can be the only one that changes. And trust me, as I type this to you, I am telling myself the same thing.
The world is about balance...giving and taking. If someone is offering you help, take it. If someone is not offering you help don't expect them to drop everything for you. Don't expect people to come to your rescue. If you need rescuing then your problems are way deeper than they appear. If someone offers you help and you turn them down, more times than not the offer will be off the table later. If you are miserable and are constantly having to spill your drama on someone just to listen but in turn you don't heed advice, your problems are YOURS. Those problems aren't going away because of....YOU! When you are concerned about no one but yourself and things don't go your way, of course your world is going to be upside down. Your bubble is a small place to be. Add issues inside the bubble and where do they have to go....NOWHERE! They are going to stick around until you change and LEAVE YOUR BUBBLE!
Here's how to be better, less whiny, less dramatic, adding value to society kind of person. Get off your ass and help someone else out. Ya, I said it!!! Stop thinking about yourself. The world is full of problems, if you try to solve them I promise you that you will feel better about yourself. If you are out in the world trying to make it a better place I promise you that you will find solutions to your own problems. If you are giving of yourself, others will want to give to you. Ya know......BALANCE!!!!!
If you give to just receive you are missing the point. Give because you want to and the universe will want to give to you. When you meet someone like me, don't expect me to save you...you wanna know why? Because I have to make sure that my life and hubby come first. If that is endangered because someone needs saving, that's a sign that no amount of my help is going to save them. And yes, if you haven't guessed, I have had to deal with exact subject in my own life in the last few days. I've had to say NO. No to watching or listening to people who will not help themselves. I will always love people for being people but it doesn't mean I can save any of them, unless they want to save themselves. I only have what's in my head and my heart. Start digging in my pockets and you're going to pull back a bloody stump...figurative of course.
Bitterly yours, Merry Ms (bite bite) Berry
P.S. If you have a friend that calls you to "just check in to say hi and howdy do", make sure you do that same. It's called being a GOOD FRIEND!
But I do not like people who are leeches, who drain the energy right from your soul. The people who know how nice you are and think they can take advantage of you. Those people in your life that do nothing but complain and dump all their problems on you. The same people that unless you are "going to take care" of them, don't want to be bothered with doing the right thing to help themselves. If you are one of these people....JUST STOP IT!(after rereading this, how do these people know that its them?...haha!)
If you are one of the people that keeps giving and giving and giving and is starting to feel resentful or just feel drained.....STOP giving! It's okay to stop. I give you permission. You have to take care of your FIRST!!! If you are the one that keeps listening to the same problems from people, over and over and over and over, and even though you have given solutions out, nothing changes....stop listening. Let these people figure out their own crap because apparently they don't think they need to listen to you. If you've been having the same conversation for years, it's time to stop having it. It's not going to change. You can be the only one that changes. And trust me, as I type this to you, I am telling myself the same thing.
The world is about balance...giving and taking. If someone is offering you help, take it. If someone is not offering you help don't expect them to drop everything for you. Don't expect people to come to your rescue. If you need rescuing then your problems are way deeper than they appear. If someone offers you help and you turn them down, more times than not the offer will be off the table later. If you are miserable and are constantly having to spill your drama on someone just to listen but in turn you don't heed advice, your problems are YOURS. Those problems aren't going away because of....YOU! When you are concerned about no one but yourself and things don't go your way, of course your world is going to be upside down. Your bubble is a small place to be. Add issues inside the bubble and where do they have to go....NOWHERE! They are going to stick around until you change and LEAVE YOUR BUBBLE!
Here's how to be better, less whiny, less dramatic, adding value to society kind of person. Get off your ass and help someone else out. Ya, I said it!!! Stop thinking about yourself. The world is full of problems, if you try to solve them I promise you that you will feel better about yourself. If you are out in the world trying to make it a better place I promise you that you will find solutions to your own problems. If you are giving of yourself, others will want to give to you. Ya know......BALANCE!!!!!
If you give to just receive you are missing the point. Give because you want to and the universe will want to give to you. When you meet someone like me, don't expect me to save you...you wanna know why? Because I have to make sure that my life and hubby come first. If that is endangered because someone needs saving, that's a sign that no amount of my help is going to save them. And yes, if you haven't guessed, I have had to deal with exact subject in my own life in the last few days. I've had to say NO. No to watching or listening to people who will not help themselves. I will always love people for being people but it doesn't mean I can save any of them, unless they want to save themselves. I only have what's in my head and my heart. Start digging in my pockets and you're going to pull back a bloody stump...figurative of course.
Bitterly yours, Merry Ms (bite bite) Berry
P.S. If you have a friend that calls you to "just check in to say hi and howdy do", make sure you do that same. It's called being a GOOD FRIEND!
August 12, 2011
Let them fall!!!!
I am blessed with many people in my life. There's a good amount of giving and receiving, loving and sharing, fighting and disagreements. This is life! I am also blessed with the continuous opportunity to help people. If people that I care about come to me with a problem or issue, 9 times out of 10 I am able to help them. It's just one of those things. I am happy to share, connect and direct someone to help them out of a negative situation.
With that said.......I am also learning when to turn around, run the other way and let people fall. Why? Because that's what my mom did for me. She gave me the chance to succeed and the chance to fail. She let me hit rock bottom, showered me with love and watched as I clawed my way back up. I earned everything I have, of course getting gifts along the way, but nothing I expected or felt I was entitled to. I am thankful for everything that has ever come into my life. And if I wasn't, it's funny but that stuff is no longer around. Interesting how that works out.
There are people out there that have never felt the pain of a skinned knee, the break of a heart being cheated or the feel of the bottom where all is lost. These kinds of people have been "protected" and spoiled by parents that thought that giving their kids everything will make life easier. In turn, it actually hurts them. It hinders them from really finding out what they are made of. It keeps them from making sound decisions bases on real life experience (since theirs are diluted). They are ungrateful to having to roll up their sleeves and kick some ass when there is ass that needs kicking. I have some of these people in my life. It's really sad to see grown adults who haven't made a sound decision in their life whine about their failures or how things aren't working out because 1) they are not trying hard enough 2) don't know what to do so they don't do anything or 3) are waiting and relying on other people to save them.
Like a mother of an addict, I am an enabler. I am an emotional enabler. I believe that deep down inside everyone knows when the rubber has to meet the road, where the right thing to is harder than the easy thing, and that when push comes to get shit done. Why? Because that's how I am. If I'm like that, shouldn't a lot of other people like that? Ask any of my peoples. If I need to get something done,......it gets done. It's not hard, you just do it. You go out and do it, no matter how hard. The right thing is always better to go than not.
So "these" spoiled individuals come to me in their desperation. I am only one person and can only really save you if you really need saving. I am blessed with people in my life that help me offer other people gifts and blessings that I can share. But, if I give you blessing, that you have asked for, and you throw it back in my face and say it's "not right for your situation", even though it is.....be warned. This is your only warning. You will not only not ever receieve another loving, heart felt gift from me again. I'll make sure you know how lost and delusional you actually are, living in a world that you think that should take care of you. You wanna know who's supposed to take care of you, as an adult.........YOU!!!!
NO ONE ELSE!!!!
Yes, we all far on hard times. This is when you roll up your sleeves, shovel shit out of your way and make things better for yourself. Not sit on your ass and wait until someone else takes care of it for you. I will let you fall. I will watch you fall from grace and have the chance, just like all of us, to find out who you really are. Fight your way back to good and congratulate you for becoming the real you. It's hard, please just fight to be the best you that you can.
Motheringly your, Merry Ms Berry
With that said.......I am also learning when to turn around, run the other way and let people fall. Why? Because that's what my mom did for me. She gave me the chance to succeed and the chance to fail. She let me hit rock bottom, showered me with love and watched as I clawed my way back up. I earned everything I have, of course getting gifts along the way, but nothing I expected or felt I was entitled to. I am thankful for everything that has ever come into my life. And if I wasn't, it's funny but that stuff is no longer around. Interesting how that works out.
There are people out there that have never felt the pain of a skinned knee, the break of a heart being cheated or the feel of the bottom where all is lost. These kinds of people have been "protected" and spoiled by parents that thought that giving their kids everything will make life easier. In turn, it actually hurts them. It hinders them from really finding out what they are made of. It keeps them from making sound decisions bases on real life experience (since theirs are diluted). They are ungrateful to having to roll up their sleeves and kick some ass when there is ass that needs kicking. I have some of these people in my life. It's really sad to see grown adults who haven't made a sound decision in their life whine about their failures or how things aren't working out because 1) they are not trying hard enough 2) don't know what to do so they don't do anything or 3) are waiting and relying on other people to save them.
Like a mother of an addict, I am an enabler. I am an emotional enabler. I believe that deep down inside everyone knows when the rubber has to meet the road, where the right thing to is harder than the easy thing, and that when push comes to get shit done. Why? Because that's how I am. If I'm like that, shouldn't a lot of other people like that? Ask any of my peoples. If I need to get something done,......it gets done. It's not hard, you just do it. You go out and do it, no matter how hard. The right thing is always better to go than not.
So "these" spoiled individuals come to me in their desperation. I am only one person and can only really save you if you really need saving. I am blessed with people in my life that help me offer other people gifts and blessings that I can share. But, if I give you blessing, that you have asked for, and you throw it back in my face and say it's "not right for your situation", even though it is.....be warned. This is your only warning. You will not only not ever receieve another loving, heart felt gift from me again. I'll make sure you know how lost and delusional you actually are, living in a world that you think that should take care of you. You wanna know who's supposed to take care of you, as an adult.........YOU!!!!
NO ONE ELSE!!!!
Yes, we all far on hard times. This is when you roll up your sleeves, shovel shit out of your way and make things better for yourself. Not sit on your ass and wait until someone else takes care of it for you. I will let you fall. I will watch you fall from grace and have the chance, just like all of us, to find out who you really are. Fight your way back to good and congratulate you for becoming the real you. It's hard, please just fight to be the best you that you can.
Motheringly your, Merry Ms Berry
August 8, 2011
It's not you, it's me. No really.
We've all heard this line but like it or not it's true. But the fun part about it is that it's true from both sides. It's both of you! Whether it's physical, mental, emotion or spiritual, there's always going to be something that shows itself to let you know a break up is near. AND THAT'S OKAY! Yes, break ups suck. But they can also be exciting. Think about it. Break ups mean a few things. 1) you or the other person is not happy. Which means something better is out there. 2) You have another life changing experience under your belt. 3) You can be recklessly, irresponsibly single. Those all sound like a lot of fun to me!
I know a lot of people who take break ups super hard because they feel like they've failed. Or they feel stupid for picking the wrong mate. Or they think there is something wrong with them. None of those are correct. We choose who we choose at that time because there's something in them that makes us want them. There's nothing wrong in that. We all make mistakes. At one point in your life you chose that person to fulfill something in your heart. If it didn't work out it means that it didn't fill you up enough and the relationship was lacking in other spots. Or you were just too different to work those differences out. Either way....it's OKAY!!!
There was a time when I dated my best friend. Almost instantaneously after the first kiss I knew I had made the wrong decision. Instead of stopping it right there I proceeded to give the relationship a chance for a couple of weeks, but I knew it was going to have to end. Something deep inside screamed and clawed its way out. During the break up talk, I had to tell him it was me because it really was. There were so many wonderful aspects of him but something bigger, stronger and wiser was working against me being with him. That was the hardest conversation that I ever had to have. I was breaking the heart of my best friend. I had to. For the sake of his happiness and that of my own.
All things have a beginning and for the most part all things have an end. It's all of the circle of life. It's just one those things. If you know there's something inside of you that logically doesn't seem to be making sense but emotionally you know you should listen....LISTEN TO IT!!! Sometimes you just have to rip off the band-aid to let the wound heal with some fresh air. If it's meant to be in the future it will. If not, then it won't.
I believe that sometimes dating is like sales. You just have to run the numbers. That and making out with people is totally fun! You are welcome to use my pick up line. "You're cute. Wanna make out?" Worked every time!!You're welcome!
Introspectively yours, Merry Ms Berry
I know a lot of people who take break ups super hard because they feel like they've failed. Or they feel stupid for picking the wrong mate. Or they think there is something wrong with them. None of those are correct. We choose who we choose at that time because there's something in them that makes us want them. There's nothing wrong in that. We all make mistakes. At one point in your life you chose that person to fulfill something in your heart. If it didn't work out it means that it didn't fill you up enough and the relationship was lacking in other spots. Or you were just too different to work those differences out. Either way....it's OKAY!!!
There was a time when I dated my best friend. Almost instantaneously after the first kiss I knew I had made the wrong decision. Instead of stopping it right there I proceeded to give the relationship a chance for a couple of weeks, but I knew it was going to have to end. Something deep inside screamed and clawed its way out. During the break up talk, I had to tell him it was me because it really was. There were so many wonderful aspects of him but something bigger, stronger and wiser was working against me being with him. That was the hardest conversation that I ever had to have. I was breaking the heart of my best friend. I had to. For the sake of his happiness and that of my own.
All things have a beginning and for the most part all things have an end. It's all of the circle of life. It's just one those things. If you know there's something inside of you that logically doesn't seem to be making sense but emotionally you know you should listen....LISTEN TO IT!!! Sometimes you just have to rip off the band-aid to let the wound heal with some fresh air. If it's meant to be in the future it will. If not, then it won't.
I believe that sometimes dating is like sales. You just have to run the numbers. That and making out with people is totally fun! You are welcome to use my pick up line. "You're cute. Wanna make out?" Worked every time!!You're welcome!
Introspectively yours, Merry Ms Berry
August 5, 2011
I want you to know me.
Because you are not alone. Today I listened a lot about good and bad, receptive and closed off, life and death, tragedies and lessons. It all made me think about me at this very second and what it all took to get me here.
When you first meet me you might think that I don't have a care in the world, I've never felt any pain, that I have always been blessed with a cheery disposition and a great outlook on life. Well....quite the contrary. What made me think about this is when the love of my life (hubby) is in a bad mood and I was unable to cheer him up. Yet, in the same day, I sent one of my bff's a text message and the exact time that he needed it and it helped pull himself out of a funk. After 2 very different conversations with 2 very different men in my life, I realized that it's all about perception and reception.
At first getting to know me you would never know that I was once a perfectionist. Or that my father was an alcoholic and I was an addict. Or that I hated myself for not being perfect. You would never know that I excelled in everything I did because I just wanted the approval of my peers and my family. I don't wear the anguish on my face from messed up relationships, getting cheated on, stabbed in the back and belittled for just being me. I've had (probably still have) haters, which is fine. I've had 3 mental breakdowns where I cried (and I mean sobbed) everyday for months, leaving me a shell of a human being. Or that I used to lay in the dark with candles lit listening to sad music. You would also never know that at one point in my life I was so brutally tormented and verbally abused and threatened that I thought killing myself would be my friends and family's only savior from this psychopath.
Why am I telling you this? I'm telling you because when I put myself out there to try and make other people feel better from a shitty day, I want them to know that I've been there. I've been in that dark place so deep that just merely existing hurt. I've been in that place where you've run out of money and every bill is due tomorrow. I've been there. I've traveled the most inner depths of my soul. I've taken journeys with other people into theirs to explore, realize and have life changing epiphanies. I've been there. I've stayed home from work and school because I was in so much pain that my back just wouldn't let me up. I've been there where my knees were so bad that I would be in tears just walking. I've been under so much stress that I now have ulcers that once stab me to my core and put me on the floor. I see you! I feel you!
I wear my heart on the outside because I want YOU to know me. I wear it to show you that I am open, vulnerable and that you can trust me. I also wear it to show people that I am not afraid. I am strong. I have fought a great fight against the world and myself from the utter depths of darkness. I came back and realized what you should happy for and what you shouldn't waste your energy on. I've been there on the brink. I've dragged my body through my own personal hell with a fucking smile on my face for the world to so no one felt my pain. I did and will always do it for you. Because I want the world to know that people like me DO exist!!! We fight our battles for others. And for what??????? Peace of mind and true happiness. It's that simple. I write for you because you need it. If you're struggling you need to know my story. You need to know that you're going to be okay. That if I can do it, so can you. You need to know that happiness is so simple to achieve it just takes some practice. It's a change in perception. It's deciding that nothing has power over you except you. No bill, no house, no boyfriend, lover, peer, drug or job!!!!
Don't be afraid. Don't be angry. You are only hurting yourself and trust me, it's not worth it.
Lovingly yours, Merry Ms Berry
When you first meet me you might think that I don't have a care in the world, I've never felt any pain, that I have always been blessed with a cheery disposition and a great outlook on life. Well....quite the contrary. What made me think about this is when the love of my life (hubby) is in a bad mood and I was unable to cheer him up. Yet, in the same day, I sent one of my bff's a text message and the exact time that he needed it and it helped pull himself out of a funk. After 2 very different conversations with 2 very different men in my life, I realized that it's all about perception and reception.
At first getting to know me you would never know that I was once a perfectionist. Or that my father was an alcoholic and I was an addict. Or that I hated myself for not being perfect. You would never know that I excelled in everything I did because I just wanted the approval of my peers and my family. I don't wear the anguish on my face from messed up relationships, getting cheated on, stabbed in the back and belittled for just being me. I've had (probably still have) haters, which is fine. I've had 3 mental breakdowns where I cried (and I mean sobbed) everyday for months, leaving me a shell of a human being. Or that I used to lay in the dark with candles lit listening to sad music. You would also never know that at one point in my life I was so brutally tormented and verbally abused and threatened that I thought killing myself would be my friends and family's only savior from this psychopath.
Why am I telling you this? I'm telling you because when I put myself out there to try and make other people feel better from a shitty day, I want them to know that I've been there. I've been in that dark place so deep that just merely existing hurt. I've been in that place where you've run out of money and every bill is due tomorrow. I've been there. I've traveled the most inner depths of my soul. I've taken journeys with other people into theirs to explore, realize and have life changing epiphanies. I've been there. I've stayed home from work and school because I was in so much pain that my back just wouldn't let me up. I've been there where my knees were so bad that I would be in tears just walking. I've been under so much stress that I now have ulcers that once stab me to my core and put me on the floor. I see you! I feel you!
I wear my heart on the outside because I want YOU to know me. I wear it to show you that I am open, vulnerable and that you can trust me. I also wear it to show people that I am not afraid. I am strong. I have fought a great fight against the world and myself from the utter depths of darkness. I came back and realized what you should happy for and what you shouldn't waste your energy on. I've been there on the brink. I've dragged my body through my own personal hell with a fucking smile on my face for the world to so no one felt my pain. I did and will always do it for you. Because I want the world to know that people like me DO exist!!! We fight our battles for others. And for what??????? Peace of mind and true happiness. It's that simple. I write for you because you need it. If you're struggling you need to know my story. You need to know that you're going to be okay. That if I can do it, so can you. You need to know that happiness is so simple to achieve it just takes some practice. It's a change in perception. It's deciding that nothing has power over you except you. No bill, no house, no boyfriend, lover, peer, drug or job!!!!
Don't be afraid. Don't be angry. You are only hurting yourself and trust me, it's not worth it.
Lovingly yours, Merry Ms Berry
August 1, 2011
I'm taking the cape off.
It's about that time. Ya know when Superman or Spiderman just wants to be a normal because when they are trying to save the world they are getting nothing but shit on. Well ya, I'm at that point. It's not one major thing that happens, it's the little stabs at the heart, the tiny inconsistencies of being inconsiderate. I always think of others before I think of myself because somewhere along this fucked up process, that's how I thought I would get treated. But sadly enough that is not the case. I want to believe people are good, but time and time again I just get pushed around, let down, or taken advantage of. AND I am the only one to blame. I give people to much bloody credit! So, I'm taking off my superhero cape. My shoulders are sore from carrying the BS of others. I will always be here to send out my words of love and strength, but right now my heart is heavy and I need to love me first.
The world will go on and people will remain the same. But until I see otherwise is my immediate life, which is totally on me, don't expect me to be saving anyone. I am saving myself and my hubby, because he's the only one that needs me now and forever, like I need him.
I thought your friends were supposed to be there to help you, not take care of you. You take care of pets and children, not GROWN adults. If you are a grown adult and feel you need to be taken care of.....GET OVER YOURSELF. YOU'RE NO ONE SPECIAL! We all have to go through crap. We all have responsibilities. And we all have to depend on no one but ourselves. I have to do what I have to do! You have to do what you have to do! Just DO IT!
Okay, I'm done. Unless something earth shattering strikes my heart and makes me want to share with you, please don't expect much from me right now. I love you all, but I love me most. I have to, because that's why you get the best of me in these words.
Sparingly, NotsoMerry Ms Berry
The world will go on and people will remain the same. But until I see otherwise is my immediate life, which is totally on me, don't expect me to be saving anyone. I am saving myself and my hubby, because he's the only one that needs me now and forever, like I need him.
I thought your friends were supposed to be there to help you, not take care of you. You take care of pets and children, not GROWN adults. If you are a grown adult and feel you need to be taken care of.....GET OVER YOURSELF. YOU'RE NO ONE SPECIAL! We all have to go through crap. We all have responsibilities. And we all have to depend on no one but ourselves. I have to do what I have to do! You have to do what you have to do! Just DO IT!
Okay, I'm done. Unless something earth shattering strikes my heart and makes me want to share with you, please don't expect much from me right now. I love you all, but I love me most. I have to, because that's why you get the best of me in these words.
Sparingly, NotsoMerry Ms Berry
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