June 9, 2011

Is it just good on paper?

From the book I was reading to a yahoo.com article that popped up on my homepage, today's topic was destined to be explored. Do love and compatibility go hand and hand, and do they have to?

We all want to be accepted for who we are and be given the opportunity to grow into ourselves. But how do we grow if we don't struggle through something? The article that I read was about being content in a relationship with no passion, but how do you find that passion without having to enter drama into your life or end up looking ungrateful for the love you are already receiving?

Is it wrong to not want to fight? Just because you  do fight does that mean you love each other or does it mean you don't get along? This subject can be so touchy because there is no fine line that dictates what side you are on. Also, passion in the beginning of a relationship doesn't stay and wears many different faces as the relationship grows with time. How do you know you are in a passionless relationship? Was it like that in the beginning? Do love the one you are with or do love the situation you have come accustomed to?

I myself do not have answers to all these questions. I, too, have fears that one day I could be in "that" place because no one is safe. We all want to be looked at with adoring eyes for the rest of our lives, is that capable or only in romance novels?

I can tell you one thing. I was in one of "those" passionless relationships. He was my best friend but more like my brother than a lover. He never fought because he was rational to my emotional. He let me be me anytime I wanted to be me but it wasn't nothing more than that. When things progressed I backed off. I felt something inside keeping me from wanting more, moving forward and ultimately falling in love. Though, I miss my friend, he deserved a love I was unable to give him as a lover. He was a great boyfriend and a fun person to be around. I was not the demanding, push comes to shove kind of person he might have needed. I, too, need someone to keep me grounded, focused and wanting more of.

Those who truly love us want us to be the best we can be. Most of us need encouragement, a little nudge or a nagging ear (or a swift kick in the ass). If you are just going through the motions and find yourself living in the love of just grey, time to start in fire in your heart.

Keep loving, Merry Ms Berry

2 comments:

  1. I really like this. Thanks for sharing it with me!! =) It's legit helpful -- I'm impressed that you could just figure it out like that and decide what to do without waffling about for like forever and a half.

    I know what I'mma do. It's game plan time!

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  2. don't give me too much credit. I was with dude for 2 years. Each time our relationship was supposed to move forward and take the next step I would freak out and retreat. I slowly learned that every action is coming from a deeper place. You fuck up as many times as I have and you learn stuff. so with that being said, fuck some shit up on

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